~~~Link to video~~~



LYRICS: (it's a little hard to follow the song without reading along, especially in the high-pitched parts, so do take a look)


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Roman English Transliteration
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

khanjar hai shak bhara, mujhe kaatta raha
aur akhir kar ek rag mei zor se chhed dal diya
behta hua nikalta hai kamzor sa pyaar
banjaata hai baansuri bhi bas ek muhlik sa hathyar

non-fiction

riyazi ilm pasand hai kyunki aasan hai
par zabanon mein bekar hun to hai nafrat un se
par konsa sach ya jhut ye hi sochta raha
to dono ke dono ghalat hi niklenge na

puchte mai kon hu jawab hi nahi hai
bas kaafi, hun raazi, ye zindagi jeene
toh kyun hai, har din, nai, hamesha kehte hain
ki kitne udaas hain, aur kitne akele?

takhte pe jo likha hai padhne aata hoga?
dil mein us ke likha jo hai padh sakte ho kya?
kon tha wo jo us dil mein bas siyaah bhar diya?
wo kon ho sakta? wo kaam kon kiya?

gintaare pe masle ka hal nikal sakte kya?
us ke gale se phansi ko nikaloge kya?
isii raaste pe chalte rehna thiik hoga kya?
ab karna hai kya? ab kar ke bhi kya?

kitna bhi waqt jo guzarta rahe
bejan nashe me ham behte gaye
khoyii huwi taaqat ke peechhe peechhe
chhupnaa
hai fuzool koshish mera

har bar jaisa kal ka sabaq na kar paaya
bas kaafi hun raazi ye zindagi jeena
to kyun hai, jo nafs ka, dua hai bas itna
ki ghaayab hojaaen, ki maut jaldi aaye?

takhte pe jo likha hai padhne aata hoga?
dil mein us ke likha jo hai padh sakte ho kya?
kon tha wo jo us dil mein bas siyaah bhar diya?
wo kon ho sakta? wo kaam kon kiya?

gintaare pe masle ka hal nikal sakte kya?
us ke gale se phansi ko nikaloge kya?
isii raaste pe chalte rehna thiik hoga kya?
ab karna hai kya? ab kar ke bhi kya?

masaawate ilaaqi yaad bhi hai kya tumhe?
bacche ke naad jo sapne the wo yaad bhi kya hai?
kon tha wo jo un sapnon ko barbaad kar diya?
wo kon ho sakta? par malum hai na?

bade hone ka hai kya tumhe koi irada?
par matlab bhi kya lafz jo hai bade hone kya?
koi hai kya aisa jo bata bhi dega mujhe?
koi bol bhi do na... ab hai hi kya faida?


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Urdu:
~~~~~

خنجر ہے شک بھرا، مجھے کاٹتا رہا
اور آخر کار اک رگ میں زور سے چھےد دال دیا
بہتا ہوا نکلتا ہے کمزور سا پیار
بنجاتا ہے باںسری بھی بس اک مہلک سا ہتھیار

نون فکشن

ریاضی علم پسند ہے کيوںکی آسان ہے
پر زبانوں میں بےکار ہوں تو ہے نفرت اُنسے
پر کونسا سچ یا جھوٹ یہی سوچتا رہا
تو دونوں کے دونوں غلت ہی نکلےنگے نا؟

پوچتےہیں میں کون ہوں جواب ہی نھی ہے
بس کافی ہوں راضی یہ زندگی جینے
تو کیوں پھر، ہر دن، نی، ھمےشا کہتے ھیں
کہ کتنے اُداس ہیں، اور کتنے اکےلے؟

تختے پے جو لکھاہے پڈھنے آتا ہوگا۔۔۔
دل مےں اُس کے لکھا جو ہے پڈھ سکتے ہو کیا؟
کون تھا وہ جو اُس دل میں بس سیاہ بھر دیا؟
وہ کون ہسکتا؟ وہ کام کون کیا؟

گنتارے پے مسلے کا ہل نکال سکتے کیا؟
اُس کے گلے سے پھانسی کو نکالوگے کیا؟
اِسی راستے پے چلتے رہنا ٹھیک ھوگا کیا؟
اب کرنا ہے کیا؟ اب کر کے بھی کیا؟

کتنا بھی وقت جو گزرتا رہے
بےجان نشے میں ہم بہتے گیے
کھویی ہوی تاقت کے پیچھے پیچھے
چھپنا
ہے فزول کوشش مرا

ہر بار جیسا، کل کا، سبق نہ کر پایا
بس کافی، ہوں راضی، یہ زندگی جینا
تو کیوں ہے، جو نفس کا، دعا ہے بس اتنا
کی غایب ہجایےں، کی موت جلدی آے

تختے پے جو لکھاہے پڈھنے آتا ہوگا۔۔۔
دل مےں اُس کے لکھا جو ہے پڈھ سکتے ہو کیا؟
کون تھا وہ جو اُس دل میں بس سیاہ بھر دیا؟
وہ کون ہسکتا؟ وہ کام کون کیا؟

گنتارے پے مسلے کا ہل نکال سکتے کیا؟
اُس کے گلے سے پھانسی کو نکالوگے کیا؟
اِسی راستے پے چلتے رہنا ٹھیک ھوگا کیا؟
اب کرنا ہے کیا؟ اب کر کے بھی کیا؟

مساوتِ علاقی یاد بھی ہے کیا تمہے؟
بچّہ کے ناد جو سپنے تھے وہ یاد بھی کیا ہے؟
کون تھا وہ جو اُن سپنوں کو برباد کر دیا؟
وہ کون ہو سکتا؟ پرمعلوم ہے نا؟

بڈے ہونے کا ہے کیا تمہے کؤی اِرادا؟
پر مطلب ہی کیا ہے لفظ جو ہے بڈے ہونے کا؟
کؤی ہے کیا اےسا جو بتا بھی دےگا مجھے؟
کؤی بول بھی دو نا۔۔۔ اب ہے ہی کیا فایدا۔۔۔!؟

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hindi:
~~~~~~

ख़ंजर है शक भरा , मुझे काटता रहा 
और आख़िर कर एक रग में ज़ोर से छेद डाल दिया 
बेहता हुआ निकलता है कमज़ोर सा प्यार 
बनजाता बांसुरी भी बस एक मुहलिक सा हथ्यार 

नॉन - फ़िक्शन 

रियाज़ी इल्म पसंद है क्यूंकि आसान है 
पर ज़बानों मे बेकार हूँ तो है नफ्रत उन्से 
पर कौन्सा सच या झूट यही सोचता रहा 
तो दोनों के दोनों ग़लत निकलिंगे ही ना ? 

पूछते,  हैं में कौन हूँ, जवाब ही नही है 
बस काफ़ी , हूँ राज़ी, येह ज़िन्दगी जीने 
तो क्यों है, हर दिन , नै , हमेशा केह्ते हैं 
की कितने उदास हैं , और कितने अकेले ? 

तख़्ते पे जो लिखा है पढ़ने आता होगा ? 
दिल में उस के लिखा जो है पढ़ सकते हो क्या ? 
कोन था वो जो उस दिल में बस सियाह भर दिया ? 
वो कौन हो सकता ? व काम कौन किया ? 

गिनतारे पे मस्ले का हल निकाल सकते क्या ? 
उस के गले से फांसी को निकालोगे क्या ? 
इसी रास्ते पे चल्ते रहना ठीक होगा क्या ? 
अब करना है क्या ? अब कर के भी क्या ? 

कितना भी वक़्त जो गुज़रता रहे 
बेजान नशे में हम बहते गए 
खोयी हुई ताक़त के पीछे पीछे 
छुपना 
है फ़ुज़ूल कोशिश मेरा 

हर बार जैसा , कल का,  सबक़ न कर पाया 
बस काफी , हूँ राज़ी , ये ज़िन्दगी जीना 
तो क्यों है , जो नफ़्स का , दुआ है बस इतना 
की ग़ायब होजाए ? की मौत जल्दी आए ? 


तख़्ते पे जो लिखा है पढ़ने आता होगा ? 
दिल में उस के लिखा जो है पढ़ सकते हो क्या ? 
कोन था वो जो उस दिल में बस सियाह भर दिया ? 
वो कौन हो सकता ? व काम कौन किया ? 

गिनतारे पे मस्ले का हल निकाल सकते क्या ? 
उस के गले से फांसी को निकालोगे क्या ? 
इसी रास्ते पे चल्ते रहना ठीक होगा क्या ? 
अब करना है क्या ? अब कर के भी क्या ? 

मसावात ए इलाक़ी याद भी है क्या तुम्हे ? 
बच्चे के नाद जो सप्ने थे वो याद भी क्या है ? 
कौन था वो जो उन सपनों को बर्बाद कर दिया ? 
वो कौन हो सकता ? पर मालूम है ना ? 

बड़े होने का है क्या तुम्हे कोई इरादा ? 
पर मतलब ही क्या है लफ्ज़ जो है बड़े होने का ? 
कोई है क्या ऐसा जो बता भी देगा मुझे? 
कोई बोल भी दो ना ... अब है ही क्या फ़ायदा ... ?!

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Literal English Translation:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The dagger, filled with doubt, kept cutting me
and finally pierced a vein with force.
Weak love comes gushing out,
and even a reed flute becomes a lethal weapon.

non-fiction

I like mathematical sciences since they're easy,
but I'm terrible at languages, so I hate them.
But if I keep thinking about which is right or wrong,
both will end up being wrong, right?

They ask me, who I am, I don't... have an answer.
It's enough, I'm satisfied, I will live this life now.
So why is it then, that every day, no, all the time, we keep saying
how we're so sad, and how we're so lonely?

You can read what's on the board, right?
Can you read what's written in their heart?
Who was it that filled their heart with black?
Who could it be? Who did such a thing?

Can you extricate a solution to this problem on the abacus?
Will you extricate the noose from around that person's neck?
Will it be okay to keep walking this path?
What do we do now? What does it matter what we do?

No matter how much time keeps passing
we kept drifting away in a lifeless stupor.
To crouch behind long-lost power,
hiding,
is my desperate, fruitless effort.

Like every time, I wasn't, able to complete yesterday's lesson.
It's enough, I'm satisfied, to live this life now.
So why is it that our soul, deep inside, has only this supplication -
to just disappear, to meet death early?

You can read what's on the board, right?
Can you read what's written in their heart?
Who was it that filled their heart with black?
Who could it be? Who did such a thing?

Can you extricate a solution to this problem on the abacus?
Will you extricate the noose from around that person's neck?
Will it be okay to keep walking this path?
What do we do now? What does it matter what we do?

Do you remember the areal equation?
Do you even remember the dreams you had as a child?
Who was it that ruined those dreams?
Who could it be? But we know already, right?

Do you have any intention of growing up?
But what does this phrase 'growing up' even mean?
Is there anyone who will just tell me already?
Please, someone, tell me... what's even the point now...?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Translation notes:
-------------------

00:37
The original was 'Les Paul', a kind of guitar, which I adapted to 'bansuri', a reed flute. Fits with a musical instrument that might be used to inflict harm. Also, it sounds almost natural in the Japanese voice!

00:52
'riyaziat' is mathematics, but it was hard to fit in both math and science, so I went with 'riyazi ilm', 'mathematical sciences', which pretty much conveys the meaning.

00:58
I guess sahi-ghalat is more appropriate than sach-jhuut. My bad.

01:04
The original line is 'today's homework is about my bland self'. I wasn't sure how to translate that and make the syllables fit, so I took some creative liberties. I don't think my line sounds too bad, honestly :p

01:23
Perhaps 'karna' would be a better verb than 'bharna', but making the syllables fit was hard. Also, 'siyaah' means both 'black' and 'ink', which fits with the themes of overworking oneself in a classroom.

01:27
Apparently 'gintaara' is the word for abacus. TIL.

02:09
I like the word 'nafs' here. Technically it's just 'soul', which might not seems apposite vis-a-vis 'lump in the heart', but it specifically has negative connotations that refer to one's dark, innermost desires that are generally consciously suppressed. So I feel it fits really nicely in this line.

02:37
I have no idea if 'masaawat e ilaqi' is actually a valid phrase that is used in Maths, lol

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Other Notes:
------------

Lost One's Weeping is, of course, by Neru. Official vid here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8oBV3jPTW4s&vl=en
Lyrics from over here.
Found a MIDI file over here.
I used this online vocaloid-esque synthesizer: https://synthesizerv.com/web/ (note that there is no save/export option. I had to record the playback to 'save')
Then used Audacity to record and put stuff together: https://www.audacityteam.org/
The off-vocal/instrumental was found here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uTnQxVngV7Y

Nice Urdu keyboard for Windows: https://urdu.ca/
Also, I used this to type the Hindi: https://www.typingbaba.com/typing/online-hindi-typing.php

The voice synthesizer was designed for Japanese, which has a syllabary structure where every consonant is followed with a vowel. This was a bit difficult to adapt to words here that have consonant clusters and word-final consonants, but I found a small trick.
If you make a very short note of the form CV, the synthesizer naturally elides the vowel to some extent. This can be exploited: Having a note of the form C1V1C2 is impossible since the software tacks on a V2 at the end. But the effects of this can be mitigated by having a normal-sized note for C1V1, then following it with a short note C2V2. Since the note is short, V2 is not as pronounced, and C1V1C2V2 ends up sounding closer to C1V1C2 than otherwise.

I've completely ignored vocal harmony because it was kinda hard to deal with *shrug*